suicide of Elle Holmes and how seemingly normal and quick and surprising decision

Tragedy of girl who secretly browsed anorexia websites: Mother's warning after suicide of teen with everything to live for

   Elle Holmes had been battling 'hidden demons' and visited 'pro ana' sites
   The controversial sites encourage eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia
   Her mother Leigh Holmes is trying to release a song Elle wrote before death
   The 15-year-old was in Beijing at the time of death where inquest was held


To those around her Eleanor Holmes was a brilliant schoolgirl and talented musician with everything to live for.

But she was secretly battling inner demons – and the only clue to what was troubling her so deeply came in a haunting song she wrote about a girl’s hidden worries about her looks.

Shortly after writing the song Eleanor, 15, killed herself, tormented by pressures to be thinner and prettier and to get on with all her friends.
committed and openly loving to her mum and her little brother. But, clearly, she did have hidden demons.

‘If this could happen to my kid, it could happen to anyone.’

The family live in China because Mrs Holmes works at the British School of Beijing but are originally from Bootle, Liverpool. A Chinese inquest found the cause of death to be asphyxiation.


The lyrics of the song Mirror, Mirror include the lines: ‘Mirror mirror don’t you see, What you show her is deadly, You killed that little girl.’

Her family had no idea anything  was wrong and say she must have  suddenly felt overwhelmed by her worries and snapped.

After her death they discovered that she had secretly browsed sick ‘pro-ana’ websites – which promote anorexia and bulimia – and had made herself sick after eating and had self-harmed in the days before her death on May 26.

Eleanor’s mother Leigh, 40, said her daughter had shown ‘no sign’ of depression and was filmed laughing in a family video hours before she died.

‘I don’t know why my loved, brilliant, popular, talented, funny baby made that decision,’ said Mrs Holmes, a teacher at an international school in China. ‘She left no note. She said nothing to the little brother she adored. No word to her boyfriend, or her close inner circle of friends.

‘There was no long-suffering depression, or slow descent into despair. The spiral into darkness seemed to occur over just a few short hours as her mind became overwhelmed and she simply snapped.’

She added it was only through ‘forensically mining’ her daughter’s computer she discovered her hidden concerns.

‘Her secret internet history revealed many of the pressures of modern life, a desire to be skinnier, prettier, have different hair. There were secret accounts on pro-ana websites,’ she said.

Eleanor was a star student with dreams of becoming a child psychologist. She had taken GCSEs a year early, was captain of her school’s swimming, netball and football teams, played three instruments and had volunteered helping orphans in Tanzania.

She wrote and performed her own songs, often accompanied on the drums by brother Oliver, 13. Among them was Mirror, Mirror. On the night of her death, Eleanor – who was also known as Elle – received texts with a Gothic-style image of skulls and nooses from a friend and sent texts asking whether another friend whom she had fallen out with had ‘given up on her’.

Mrs Holmes said: ‘Elle appears to have started becoming distressed and began texting a friend, a blameless young artist who also was exploring her own demons, who could not have known the state of mind Elle was in from such short digital messages, carrying none of the nuance or body language of a real conversation.

‘We can only imagine what dark tunnels Elle’s mind took her down from there onwards, but roughly two hours later, my wonderful baby died – leaving me heartbroken.’

Mrs Holmes is now in talks with singer Anita Prime from New Zealand to record a version of Mirror, Mirror to help support girls struggling with their body image.

The record will raise money for teenage mental health charity Papyrus. To donate in Eleanor’s memory visit: www.elleaholmes.com.

Family friend Sheree Brown wrote a blog warning parents of the dangers of technology, especially in teenagers’ rooms at night.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2714674/Mirror-mirror-killed-little-girl-Haunting-song-lyrics-written-brilliant-schoolgirl-15-died-visiting-eating-disorder-websites.html#ixzz3iH8DQ45q
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By Agencies

10:14AM BST 03 Aug 2014

A mother whose teenage daughter took her own life discovered she had been visiting pro-anorexia websites and self-harming before her death.

Leigh Holmes said it was only after losing her daughter, Elle, that she realised the 15 year-old had been battling "hidden demons".

The teenager, who was in top sets at school and had taken her A-levels early, had been on "pro ana" websites that critics claim encourage eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia, and in a few days before she died, had been self-harming.

A video filmed a few hours before Elle made the fatal decision, shows her laughing with her brother, Oliver, 13, playfully trying to catch grapes in her mouth, with no sign she was depressed or in crisis.

But the hidden internet history on her computer showed Elle, who grew up in Bootle, Merseyside, was secretly troubled by the pressures of modern life - a desire to be thinner and prettier.

Before her death in May, Elle recorded a song which her mother wants to share to bring hope to other youngsters struggling across the world and raise funds for teens in crisis.

The song, Mirror, Mirror, deals with the problems of body image in young girls.

"Everybody wants to know 'why'. To be honest, I still don't know," Leigh, an international school teacher, said.

"I don't know why my loved, brilliant, popular, talented, funny baby made that decision. She left no note. She said nothing to the little brother she adored. No word to her boyfriend, or her close inner circle of friends.

"There was no long-suffering depression, or slow descent into despair. The spiral into darkness seemed to occur over just a few short hours as her mind became overwhelmed and she simply snapped.

"Nobody who saw her in the weeks and days and hours before her death would have said that this was a child suffering from depression.

"The morning before she died she was revising for her exams before a trip to the school's summer fayre with her friends. In the afternoon, she'd been dancing barefoot in the restaurant she worked in, singing along with the songs and making her customers smile.

The teenager had been captain of the school's swimming, netball and football teams and was in the top set for all her subjects, taking A level and GCSEs years early.

She was also a school ambassador who completed 10 days volunteering in Tanzania, renovating a primary school and teaching children.

Ms Holmes 40, said: "Elle was the kid every kid wanted to be and the one other parents hoped their kid would make friends with.

"She was a dream child: funny, mischievous, caring about her family, committed and openly loving to me, her mum, and her little brother. I have a wonderful video of her filmed a few short hours before she made that fatal decision, laughing with her brother and friends as she tried and failed to catch grapes in her mouth.

Researching Elle's computer history found secret accounts on "pro-ana" websites. She was also purging after eating.

Her mother added: "The trouble with bulimia is the signs aren't as obvious - there is rarely any dramatic weight loss, and even her dentist assumed the change in her teeth was down to over brushing, rather than the damage caused by regurgitated stomach acid.

"Digging deeper, we found that in the few days before she died, Elle had started to take this body dysmorphic disorder to a new level by self-harming.

"She always wore large colourful sweatbands, or the chunky purple bracelet. Either one was a common sight on her wrist, so in those few short days leading up to her death, we all missed it.

"In the last few messages on social media, she shared with a friend that it had frightened her, and agreed she needed to stop."